418

Long time no see here. Somehow life was incredibly busy the last weeks. On the moments I didn't have to work for school, I tried to stay away from any "computer work" as much as possible. Cooking, baking, looking for houses and an awful lot of knitting.

Many things are changing. I'm starting my internship soon and with that comes a move to Amsterdam and I'll never have to live in Eindhoven again. Can't wait. 

413

Never under-estimate the tiniest of things.
I'd like to have a coat with a hundred pockets, all filled with little treasures. I'd roam the streets all day and sell my treasures to hurried strangers. This song is fitting: click.

407

Finding a dead bird always makes my day. They're always paired with loving feelings.

405

THIS MESSAGE IS ESPECIALLY FOR PEOPLE IN THE NEWYORKCITY AREA.

Hi! Do you see these two lovely lads? They are called Daniel and Marius and they are both German, but that doesnt keep them from wearing cool shoelaces and socks with hearts on them.
They are about to visit New York City to photograph the smallest skyscrapers. Great plan. The only problem is that they still need a place to sleep from the 19th of august till the 23rd (and possibly also middle of september).
Are you a nice person willing to host two nice boys for a night or two? Or do you know anyone who would? Please let me know.
I also added the picture of the flowers to show that I'm sure they'd be willing to thank you for your kindness with anything a poor student who spent all their money on a ticket to new york, has to offer.

(I'm just worried they're going to end up under a bridge and then get stabbed by big american dudes with cheeseburgers with knives in them..)

401

What I enjoyed the most on summerholidays with my parents as a kid, was simply driving from one place to another. Long carrides of sleeping, reading, listening to music or simply staring out the window at the passing landscape.

This summer (and most resent summers), I've been having those same kind of rides, but instead of my family's car, I've let myself get transported and lulled into sleep by trains and busses and trams. Traveling back and forth between homes. Not completely by choice though.. I tend to forget stuff all the time and then I have to get back again. But I try to not be too annoyed by myself and just enjoy that I've finished two and a half books in two days.
Plus, it is a good practice in a way. In a bit more than a week, I'll make a 9(!)-hour traindrive to the south of Germany for a holiday filled with cheese, wurst, beer, mountains, lakes, sheep, germans, biking - and hiking-adventures and peace love and happiness. (ha!) I'm super excited.


ps. I also got a tumblr. I dont know why. Because I'm a modern girl!

400

The best thing about Amsterdam is that every cafe has its own housecat. You know how some people always play with their phones while they wait for somebody to finish their peeing, or wait for them to show up or to stop calling with their mum or something.. Well I dont have a smartphone, but I do have a big love for cats, and so in those situations in Amsterdam cafes, I can never really be bored.
The best thing about my room is that I can see a very big part of the sky and that this part of the sky fills itself with balloons on summer nights. They get me very excited.
The best thing about this weather is that you can wear woolen socks and sweaters, but also floaty pants and cheap shoes and no need for a coat.
The best thing about today is that in 2 days I'll have holidays and they will be filled with all the best things in life, I think.

(the worst thing about this scanner is that it gives this awful stripe.. and the worst thing about me is that I'm too lazy and impatient to scan them all in again on another scanner..)

397

Working, escaping, working, escaping. I spend a lot of time staring at my screen, staring out of trainwindows and staring up at windows of houses. The staring up should be kept to a minimum though, because I keep crashing into people / cars / lampposts.
Do you know how sometimes you spend so much time thinking in a certain way, that your brain adapts to this and uses it for other things as well? When I was doing my math-exams a couple of years ago, Everything I saw and heard was instantly made into some kind of graph or formula by my head. Right now I work on patterns inspired by windows and houses, so my mind is now kindly highlighting interesting parts, counting elements and drawing lines over everything I see..

396

I wish I was a fisherman, tumblin' on the seas
far away from dry land, and it's bitter memories
casatin' out my sweet line, with abandonment and love
no ceiling bearin' down on me, save the starry sky above

This song kept playing in my head, as I walked by the water with a fisherman by my side.
The version of Pan I Am is my favourite and reminds me of a night years ago, where they played a show in the smallest venue, for a handful of people, so impressive and so full of energy that it is still on my list of best shows ever in the world. 2008 was not the worst year of my life. Memories of this music go hand in hand with Vrederick's photos for some reason. And it turns out, he is not just a cool photographer, but also a very cool person in general.

1. Schepen onder de kust voor anker, Willem van de Velde (II), ca. 1660
2. Een schip in volle zee bij vliegende storm, bekend als 'De windstoot', Willem van de Velde (II), ca. 1680

395

One of those dead birds was found on the birthday of the hero of roadkill photography (and more), Jack Adams. Definitely one of the coolest people I've never met.

Also I dont think you have to go vegan. Personally I would never do it because I quite like cheese and pancakes. But I am wondering a bit about the thoughts behind this protest grafitti. Would it be like: "look at how happy those cows would look if they were just hanging around in the grass. Lets not eat them!" Or maybe like: "Do you think this plastic, square cow looks tasty? This is how all cows look, because they are so modified. So you should go vegan." Or maybe somebody was just a bit high (it is amsterdam after all) and sat on the cows and then fell off because they lost their balance, but then they got very pissed off at the cow for no reason at all, and then wrote "go vegan". And I hear you think that that wouldnt make sense, because if you are pissed off at the cow, you want it killed. But it is more that if we would all go vegan, there would be a lot less cows probably. Eitherway. For whatever the reason may be, I'm glad they did it, because it makes me smile.

394

Just one hour biking away from Amsterdam we found ourselves in proper flat Dutch countryside. We spent two days in a tent, making dinner on a small fire, smoking by the side of the lake as we watched the red ball of sun slowly fall in the water (so cheesy, you almost wouldnt believe it could be real). Biking to the touristic cute towns, ending up between the 60+ mass tourists, laughing at the sea, drinking beers in a bar with music and a book of lists, and spending all our 50cent coins in the shower in order to stay a bit warm.
A birthday celebration of sorts. Mostly a perfect escape from busy city life. I just got all my tickets for summerplans sorted. Two short German holidays, one with mountains and one with music.

393

Lately, a lot of my adventures have been food-related. There has been fish-heads, candy-making, pizza-parties, bitterballen-birthdays, eggs on the side of the road, Dutch-German cheese-tours, salt and pepper from fresh friends in cups with boobs and a giant penis..
And today my classmates had me laying on the floor while they covered my face with blue shit, in order to make a chocolate replica of my nose (this worked out well! We also tried an ear, but that is not so easy. Neither are fingers)..

390

The blog is a bit silent, and I am not taking so much pictures anymore. But life is good and exciting. Healthy living and enjoying the sun, good books, good food, good people, good chairs. I still get sad, but it ain't like before. (Jonathan, what's happening?)

388

German artschool-boys: living out of the box.

386

Words and images fail to express how completely, totally happy and sad I feel right now. Both at the same time. It's like an atomic bomb is exploding in my head and heart and my entire body. Although this is of course the shittiest of comparisons I could give, but you know; it's on my mind these days with all the talk about atomic bombs. So deal with it. 

Wow. 

Hamburg, Hamburg, Hamburg.... 

Just watch this. That kind of says it all. Or maybe not, but it is a cool song either way.

Tschüßli müßli. 

384

"Ik ren als een paard naar het licht van het noorden. Hij noemt me Lilith en rent als een ruiter. Mijn tenen voelde ik al een tijd niet meer, maar de snijdende kou van die dag maakte het vuur en de koffie die ons te wachten stonden, des te beter."

A girl dipped her icecream in her hot chocolate while her parents played the games she wasn't interested in.

"Art." They put a large white stone on the table and the father looked annoyed. It looked like a head, but not like his.

Walking all the way backwards, just to not lose sight of the clouds, which kept changing.

There is a game we would play, you hold somebody by their hand and they close their eyes, then you make sure they will have an interesting view and let them open their eyes for a split second. Taking a picture with your eyes.

I do this for myself when I want to remember moments forever. They are more powerful than any real image could ever be.

When the sky shows the world her most beautiful colours, it feels a bit like nature is playing this game with us. Just a split second. Before you know it, it's dark again. But I can still recall the most beautiful skies in my mind.

The song of this post is Le petit Chevalier - Nico

Je suis le petit chevalier,
avec le ciel dessus mes yeux,
je ne peux pas me effrayer.

Je suis le petit chevalier,
avec la terre dessous mes pieds
J'irai te visiter
J'irai te visiter

(I am the little knight, with the sky above my eyes, I cannot be frightened,
I am the little knight, with the earth under my feet, I will come to visit you, I will come to visit you)

382

German easters are slightly different than the Dutch ones. Everyone seems to have left town for familyweekends with big meals and presents and I dont know what. Meanwhile, Hamburg is busy covering herself with a blanket of snow.
So my weekend will be spent inside with a lot of coffee, fellow lonely souls, tulpen aus Amsterdam, pancakes and some good books. Maybe not very German, but enjoyable nonetheless.
Frohe Ostern!

381

I wish that I could write about how it was for me,
when I grew up among the mountains, wolves and redwood trees,
but I was never there, were you ever there?

I don't know why this feeling keeps on coming back to me
That I need to go into a place where I can see that things can be small,
even the trees, and the cars, and the roads and the houses and the other mountaintops
And the only thing that is big is the sky. 

(To All My Friends)

I actually dont like the mountains that much. Too high, too static, too dangerous in an uncomforting way. But I do love cities that feel like mountain landscapes: with towering buildings to make you feel small and with windows that look down on rooftops to make you feel like the queen of the world. With millions of paths and corners to discover and get lost in. And somewhere in between all of this enormousness, hidden away from everything and everyone else - a small, secret cave of warmth and comfort; surrounded by it all and yet completely isolated and on its own.

372

Die Liebende [abermals] - Goethe
Warum ich wieder zum Papier mich wende?
Das mußt du, Liebster, so bestimmt nicht fragen:
Denn eigentlich hab' ich dir nichts zu sagen;
doch kommt's zuletzt in deine lieben Hände.

Weil ich nicht kommen kann, soll, was ich sende,
mein ungeteiltes Herz hinübertragen
mit Wonnen, Hoffnungen, Entzücken, Plagen:
Das alles hat nicht Anfang, hat nicht Ende.

Ich mag vom heut'gen Tag dir nichts vertrauen,
wie sich im Sinnen, Wünschen, Wähnen, Wollen
mein treues Herz zu dir hinüberwendet.

So stand ich einst vor dir, dich anzuschauen,
und sagte nichts. Was hätt' ich sagen sollen?
Mein ganzes Wesen war in sich vollendet.

This blog has become an ongoing loveletter to Hamburg.
I feel so at home here, but it still surprises me some times. This morning I got up late and walked outside. I got a coffee to go and walked through one of my favourite streets. There was a group of people getting a guided tour. And this is hard to explain but I suddenly felt so very much a part of this city and not at all like a tourist or a visitor. I've felt at home here ever since I set foot on these Hamburgian grounds, but I also felt a lot like all of this was not really mine and that I am just borrowing it all. I borrow this room, I borrow these streets, I borrow my place in the class, I borrow this language, I borrow the people I call friends here, I borrow the german habits I develop, etc... Or that most things are more of other people than of me. This all sounds very possessive but that's not quite what I mean. And I will not even try anymore to explain it because I've been sitting here for half an hour now, coming up with six million metaphors to try to explain this, but they dont work.

I just like the way things go and how I can feel more comfortable everyday and even though I have to leave again soon, it feels good to know that this city has really become much more than just a visiting place. It's also a scary thing. But commitment in any kind of way is scary.

On the photos are two beautiful, crazy minds and two beautiful views and neither of them ever fail to make me feel happy.