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Making patterens and missing my Hamburg. The sounds and smells of the harbour, the cold salty wind prickling your face, the beers and bretzels and the foreign chatter. I try not to think of it too much, because you should try to be happy where you are, but sometimes the missing is just there all of a sudden.

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I have a very lovely and talented friend who goes by the name of Lukas / Lukat. He wrote and illustrated a real actual graphic novel and is very famous now because it is real good. I bought it in my favourite bookstore and finished it later that night, in the light of googletranslate, hidden under covers.
I never quite liked comics as a kid. I only read them on holidays when I had already finished all my own librarybooks and had to read the comics my brother had picked out (some sort of compromise of my mum, who tried to get him to read). But recently I have discovered the joys of graphic novels. It is like watching a movie in your hands. I read them often in the library of Amsterdam. If you know of any good ones, you should let me know.
I was a very lucky girl because my copy is signed with a cat. Maybe you are not so lucky, but you could still get the book and then you are also a bit lucky.

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Once I described my head as a big bowl completely filled with millions of fishes. The fishes come in all different sizes and shapes and patterns and they are constantly on the move, swimming swimming swimming. It's a great thing to look at this fishbowl. You will never be bored, because the view is constantly changing. But if you try to grab one of those fishes to hold on to it for a little longer, they just slip right out of your hands again and you are holding another fish all of a sudden.
Having nothing to hold on to can be very scary and makes you stop just right in your tracks. The trick for me is to act like a machine in order to create some kind of structure, or maybe in order to overshout the thoughts. Extreme focus on 1 dumb thing drowns everything else. You can just tell yourself that you have to spot all the red fishes and after a while you will see nothing else. It is a game I play while I am in busy, stressful rooms as well: I think of a colour or a number and then quickly run my eyes across the room and then it's like all the things of that colour just lightup and the rest gets dark and desaturated.
In highschool I used to do mathematical equations to escape from the big bowl of thoughts. These days I like to draw animals with indian ink. Trying to find the right shapes and lines and filling them in with hundreds of tiny dots. It is just like meditation, but with physical results, so even better.
It is not really 'art', but I put her with it to sort of justify the unerased pencillines and the unfinishedness of them all. I might show some more drawings like this some time. 

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I try to draw everyday, it's meditative.
A postcard to a friend and a breakfast at the studiodesk.

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Wow thanks for all the nice reactions on the last post! I'll put the deadline for this sunday, so you can still comment and be in it to win it. (HA).

These days I've been doing a lot of reading (dreaming) and drawing (practicing) and working (learning) and also some obsessing over amazing ladies like Marina and Patti. 

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Bruce Neumann, coloured pencil drawings & birthday-outfit made by my mum!

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Today we celebrated sinterklaas. It was a lot of fun as always and there were many great presents and poems! It really is my favourite holiday ever ever ever. Tomorrow my girlgang is coming over for part two!
I gave my parents a drawing of my brother and I. He doesn't really have pink hair and neither of us actually wear eyeshadow but we do have freckles and glasses! 

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I'm 21 now. meow!
(Our flat is in a constant state of celebration)

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Some drawings I did of Salmer fra kjøkkenet, myself and myself as a cat. I'm always a bit too lazy / scared to finish a drawing completely.

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"be master and designer of yourself."

this piece of wall is the one I can look at easily from everywhere around the room, so that's where I put up sketches so I can see if I still like them after a few hours, or a few days. 

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result of today's class, because drawing is more fun than listening and because I like the name Francis. 

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Once, last year, we had to make a comic. Even though It took me way too much time, I was quite happy with the result. Shortly after, in a village in Australia called Nihill we found a beautiful deserted trainstation where trains would only come every other day (and only 1 every day), and it looked so much like I'd imagine the station of my drawing. My father took a picture of me.

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I haven't really posted any drawings here I think, not for a year or so. I am not quite confident about my drawing, but I love doing it. I got some new pencils (0.05 fineliner and a 'cool grey' marker) and wanted to draw men with beards. You're also not supposed to shave your moustache this month. I'll try to let mine grow, you too?

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(pictures of my evaluation; drawings, books, architecture models of my house, magazine, architecture drawings, poster for cigarperformance with drawing by Lotta)

I passed my final evaluation, which also means I passed the first year of the Design Academy.

I can't believe this year is over. It feels like time has gone by so fast, although when I think back of the person I was when I started this and look at the person I am now, they feel so different.

This has definitely been the most intense year of my life (so far). I've never worked so hard, stayed up working for so many nights in a row, gone through such deep lows but also such high highs.

But it's been amazing. I got to know so many inspiring and wonderful people. And I've learned so much. I got accepted here with some 'graphic work', some photos and a few drawings. And now I've made chairs out of wood and metal, I've made ceramic vases, I did performances, learned about myself, painted huge paintings, drew a lot, made weird shapes, wrote articles, drew architecture plans etc.

But for now: Summer! I'm leaving for Australia this sunday which is amazing, but I will miss everyone here, after seeing them pretty much every day since this year started. I woke up to a text: "Bobby, what am I going to do without you? I already miss you." so today we did some Academy rehab, by hanging around school, drinking iced coffee. I do have quite a few wonderful non-academy adventures planned this week though, don't worry ;)

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I have been drawing a lot lately. This is a drawing I did of and for a friend who had her birthday yesterday. Currently working on architecture plans. I will never become an architect, that's for sure.

I am listening to Palpitation because they are amazing.

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So I've been drawing again, because we have to. And I actually really like drawing, but I just don't have much time for it. In fact. I don't have time to do this either, because I should be painting. whoo.

(original pictures by Frenchie & Martin)

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To All My Friends played a gig in Bremen and I wasn't there because I was here, working on my shapes. But they stayed over at Martin's place who was so kind to skypecall me during their soundcheck and they are amazing. <3

I also can't draw faces. I have a collection of faceless people in my notebook now.

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This was definitely one of the nicest assignments so far. And even though my eyes don't even look like they belong to the same person, I'm still pretty happy about the result.

This will also bring me to my second list of amazing people.

Amazing people, II

11. Teun Hocks (my drawing teacher)

12. Annette Pehrsson

13. Evelyn Dragan

14. Wilhelm Sasnal

15. Michelle Bours

16. James Yorkston

17. Talking Heads

18. Zombie Kid

19. Aled Lewis

20. Deak Rostochil

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Meet my new superhero-friends: Mr. Super Stockings, Lady Fingerlegs & Hairy Fairy.

We are and will be fighting for gender-equality in this country, this world and beyond. We still hope and believe to see this happen in the near future.

Love,

109

I've been in my new house since last saturday. It's a lovely place. The house is a very cute one (from the outside) and it's in a nice neighbourhood with lots of cats and we have a nice big messy garden en my rooms are bigger and my housemates are incredibly sweet. So I'm really happy.

I drew some 'whoo I have a new address, come visit me and send me stuff'-cards on wednesday. I had a lot of fun making them.